Thinking

I have been thinking quite a bit recently but in pieces. I keep meaning to type up something meaningful and worthwhile but keep failing when it actually comes time to put fingers to keyboard.

As I typed the above I rememberd why.

This time of year for me is always odd. We move towards the old celtic / pagan new year, which (like the old day) started as the time became darker.

(did you know that this is the reason the Jewish sabbath, Saturday, is considered to start Friday night? Sundown was the start of the day).

We move towards All Hallow's Eve, Samhain, the end of the celtic year, the day the veil thins and the other side is closest to this one and we may, if we are lucky (Unlucky?) see the dead or the future, as we watch the harvest gathered, the death of the plants and animals that are to sustain us through the cold and hunger of the winter.

It also merges, for me, into the other Death-Day celibration ~ that of my mother.

18th November 2007 will be 20 years since her death. Half my life without her.

(Darn, I typed 40, my age!)

It always hurts, I am always more sensitive to things. I watched Michael Palin's New Europe (recorded) about Romania. There was a woman going home to her Mama, greeting her laughing with her talking huging. And Mama had a scarf wrapped about her hair. A scarf that looked identical to a shawl I brought back from a school trip to Russia for my Mom. A shawl she loved and wore and wore and wore till it was soooo dirty she had to wash it. The colours ran. She cried. I couldn't repace it, so I cried. She binned it. I remembered that seeing the program, and hubbie noticed and asked if I was OK. I explained and.... he understood, held my hand & squeezed. He's a good bloke, and I am getting misty eyed at work thinking about this.

But before dawn comes dusk and night.

Hey ho. Oddly that is not what I was going to post about. Maybe that post will come later.